When we first set forth on this dance journey we hear terms like “Leaders or Followers” and the roles get over simplified which give people the wrong idea. After this week’s Night Club class I had a great talk with a leader that took the class. The main question was “How do I connect with my partner when their arms are so loose they won’t even hold a frame?”
My answer was simple…”You can’t and you won’t!” Some people will never get it…some (like myself) its takes a lot longer to get it…Still others understand connection 100% in their brains, but can’t stop their feet from dancing ahead of the leader. All of this is out of the leader’s control so my advice is to smile your way through that dance or class and find a partner that has the connection you want.
Followers have so little to do with following that I honestly can’t believe we settled on it as an accepted term at all. Metronome, Time keeper, frame filler, or connection facilitator may be too wordy but they are far better descriptors of what the follower actually does. If the leader is an exercise ball the follower is the air that fills his frame.
Last weekend I danced 3 nights in a row and had the greatest level of diversity of follower that I can remember having in a long time. Beginner dancers not withstanding, my dances with intermediate level and above all included some very magical musical moments that were facilitated by the follower more than 50% of the time. I was speed up, slowed down, and had my patterns extended so that I could “shine” as the leader. Listen, I am good at music theory and getting my patterns to match up to the songs but when I let my followers fill my frame we took turns leading and following and I wouldn’t have it another way!
Great Example of a follower Facilitating a great dance!
